April 8, 2021


Journal: April 9, 2021

Cathy is helping her brother recuperate from his stroke. The court has granted her Breeanna. It's the first day of class between the two of us. I guess I just wanted to set some ground rules.  

What do I need her to think of me? I will settle for unstable and fearful.

Cathy's relationship with me has always been troubled.

But in the winter months as Chris got sick we were working out a way to get past everything

I so much wanted to be a force of nurturance for her. She deserved that and even if she didn't, as someone who married her old brother it was simply my place.

We buried the hatchet.

It wasn't easy. There were memories of slights. It's just hard to let go of. When Chris and I got married and I moved to Ohio I have to say that I had no social skills. Cathy treated me like the Neaderthal that I was. She was justified.

Six months was the prognoses rehabilitation period. I would have taken that time off of work to make sure that Chris got the support, care and rehabilitation that he needed. I offered.

Because Chris had a stroke I thought he would retire from his work so then our family was mobile. We all could go to Las Vegas and invest in my mother. I wanted the kids to understand what was good about her.  

The court system got involved and granted custody of Breeanna to Cathy. 

Through great effort Chris is regaining his motor effects. 

I know that Chris doesn't want to go to Vegas but it's a good plan. The kids would have their grandmother and him and me.

In the end the Las Vegas plan is dashed. I wanted that plan really, really hard.

I bought an ice maker. It had damage to the box and was discounted by $50. The price drop went from $130 to $80. 

Financially, it was a sound purchase. The break even point is four months. (Ice cost $2/bag, purchased every three days.)

I left the stove on at home this morning when I left for work. When I got there I told Ms. Morris:

"You are going to slit my throat and hang me out to dry."

She let me take the day off.

I formulated how the YouTube format would flow.

Here's what I came up with as far as interview questions:

What do you think is the biggest challenge that kids in high school graduates face?

What kind of mistakes can people make when they are starting out in life?

How do they avoid making those mistakes?

What do you think children need to understand about business when they are starting out in the world?

Talk to me about commitment. What does that word mean to you?

Talk to me about values. Do high high school graduates have good values these days?

What do you think it takes to develop good values?

If a person is just graduating from high school what do they need to understand about business because they are just entering the job market?

What do kids need to know to get a good job?

How do they make themselves stand out as being more competitive than the next person? How do they position themselves to a future employer?

What do kids need to know to be successful in this world?

Talk to me about saving money how important is that? How do you even begin to save? How hard is it to save money?

What are some assumptions that people that are starting out in life that are just wrong?

How do high schoolers or high school graduates get real about life?

Tell me what your life was like when you graduated from high school and how the world is an entirely different place now?

Tell me about what a high school graduate has to look forward to in their future?

How can a high schoolers set themselves up for success?

What has been some tough decisions that you have made in your life?

What is your why? What is your happiness in life? What gets you out of bed in the morning? What is the reason why you do what you do?

What do you think young people need to understand about climate change?

How do you think climate change will affect their lives going forward into the future?

How do you think the world will be affected by climate change 10 years from now or 20 years from now?

What do you think we can do to be a part of the solution?

I even made a new meditation podcast with a gratitude bent to it.  I think life is cloudy with a chance of meatballs right now.  Things will get better.

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